A little popcorn tidbit
Shortly after moving to this sleepy village, we adopted the ritual of making every Saturday movie day. We break out our latest DVD from the 32-peso bin or find something on the internet, pop up some palomitas and have a few cold ones. At first I made the popcorn in a frying pan, but after a couple months we moved up to an air popper. One batch from the machine made a nice big bowl for each of us. All was well until a few months ago when the Mexigringo went off popcorn and started having guacamole instead, leaving me with a big dilemma: the popcorn machine instructions asserted that the machine required a minimum of a half-cup of popcorn kernels to function. Totally addicted to popcorn as I now was, this was no laughing matter.
I think I may be the last idiot in the world who reads instruction pamphlets. I also notice, and often obey, warnings and instructions posted on signs. For someone who is skeptical to the point of paranoia about everything else I read or hear, this is a curious blind spot indeed. Maybe it’s my innate mistrust of mechanical things.
Anyway, what to do with all that popcorn? It was twice as much as I could reasonably eat. I valiantly tried one time — bad idea. I guiltily threw away half another day, but that just felt too wicked. I tried to think of other uses for the extra — string it into curtains or door dividers? Save it for packing material in case we move? The specter of attracting rats dampened my enthusiasm for these ideas.
As usual, it was the Mexigringo to the rescue about the fourth Saturday on, as he was making his guacamole while I whined about him leaving me in the popcorn lurch.
MG: So just make half the amount.
Me: But the instructions say you have to…..
MG: Just – TRY – it.
Me: (snivel, grumble)
Well, guess what folks? The instruction book lies! The machine will pop half of the prescribed amount with no problem at all.
You know, it was bad enough getting used to the news being all lies. But the freaking popcorn instructions?????